Now, the most important thing to be considered here is how you can save your marriage if it is going through a tough phase. Also, if there is not any big issue in your marriage what should be done to stay happy like this forever? First of all, you will have to understand that your life and marriage will be full of obstacles and problems and you have to fight with them with full enthusiasm.
For all those people who want to maintain happiness in their lives and want to improve their married lives, we have tried to elaborate some tips which may prove helpful to them.
You must be aware of the fact that genders do have different emotions, requirements, fidelity, perception and communications. Both have different ways of learning and understanding things because they were brought up in different environments. This is the major reason for argument between the couples. They must understand that shouting at the other person and proving your own point is going to spoil their own bond and affection.
They must start accepting each other possessing different mindset and emotions which are incomparable. This can bring happiness and romance back in your life. You must calmly listen to what other person is saying and what he or she wants rather than just jumping to the conclusions. Respect the feelings and emotions of other person and never use foul language to hurt the other person.
Communication is one of the most important factors in a relationship. Talk to your partners about your fears, feelings and your problems. He or she definitely will help you out if you are true to him or her and ask for support. Walking away and shouting at the other person will only increase differences and may leave you all alone.
It will take time to recognize the gender differences and how you can avoid the conflicts and confrontations. However, it is highly recommended to keep trying to work for improving the relationships and make it more beautiful. One person alone will not be able to do it; both the partners must contribute equally and put in extra efforts to make this work. You will realize that instead of getting divorced, little more patience and intelligence will make lots of difference in your life.
Helping each other
During marriage counseling, lots of couples complain that the other person does not understand at all and never offers a helping hand. If you want to make your marriage more meaningful, you must notice small things and help your partner in various tasks at home. Some of the scenarios are elaborated below when you can be a support to your partner:
- When the husband is in a hurry and have to leave for meetings, the wife can offer him stuff to carry to the office. Also, when he is busy in meeting the deadlines and has to work, the wife must not complain or bring household issues.
- You can ask your kids to stay away from their father so that he is able to complete his work in time; else he will feel frustrated.
- The husbands can take care of the kids when their mother is busy in the kitchen.
- The wives can take care of the laundry and pick up the shirts for him if he has forgotten to do so. He will feel delighted and will be motivated to help you in return.
- The husbands can help her in the kitchen and other household work occasionally and she will feel loved and cared for. Small things will make big differences for both the partners.
Marriage and your finances
One of the major causes of divorce and differences in marriage is money. This is because of the reasons that both of them have different ways of spending and saving money which may result into conflicts and problems. It is highly recommended that both husband and wives must discuss expenses and how to deal with their luxuries after marriage so that no one feels cheated and being in bad situations.
If you talk out your financial matters in open with each other, you will have higher chances of saving your marriage. Adjustments are part of life and both of you must be able to adjust with each other so that you are able to lead a financially stable life.
Reduce your shopping trips, if you know that your husband has habits of spending money lavishly. This way, you are not only supporting your husband but will also stabilize the financial condition of your husband.
An unstable financial status of a family will lead to more problems and sometimes end up in courtrooms. This is one of the reasons why it is required to secure the future of your family financially also.
During your courtship periods, you might have spent long hours on the phones to discuss what the other person’s interests are and how he or she spent time in office. It has been observed that after marriage, couple is just not ready to listen to the boring stories of office and the work place. They become so self-centered that they start ignoring what the other person likes or dislikes.
If the husband wants to watch a pornographic film prior to love making and if the wife does not like it; she should make it a point to convey the message to him without hurting his feelings and tell him that you do not like this practice. He will understand and both of you can find out the solution to this problem.
Likewise, if the wife is interested in charitable work and husband does not like to participate in these social gatherings, he must tell his wife about it without digressing her. Both of you must be able to respect the thoughts and opinions of each other and this is how the relationship will flourish and grow stronger. You must make efforts so that you are able to accept the likings and disliking of other person and avoid all those things that can create problems.
Moments to cherish
Many couples feel that after the birth of kids, they hardly find any time for each other. They feel that there is no time for love and romance. All the time they are occupied with the thoughts of meeting their dead ends. The financial commitments are more than ever before which leave them dull and sorrowful.
They must understand that having kids in their family is the most important thing that can happen to them. However, it can also be said that they must never go for unplanned pregnancies. Raising kids is a big responsibility and both of them must mentally and physically be prepared for giving birth and bringing up children.
In order to work it out in better way, you can take out some time for each other. You can figure out when you are able to spend quality of time in balconies and living rooms. You can do it either late nights or early mornings when you do not have kids around you. This can ignite the love between both of you and you can overcome the problems and daily life’s stress.
Complementing and praising each other
It has been observed that spouse starts blaming the other person for mistakes and their shortcomings. No one likes to listen to bad about themselves. They discover the fact that praises and complements were part of their lives when they have just started their relationship. After few years, they find out that complaints and blames have become part of their daily routine. It is easier to blame others and walk out of the door.
Praising can contribute lots in your married life. Giving credit to the other person can revive your relationship. Small compliments can make your life more exciting and worth living. Your spouse can wear a nice gown or suit to impress you. A nice compliment can bring a smile on his or her face and ensure a wellness of your marriage. If you husband is a skilled worker and hardworking employee; praise him for this and this will boost his confidence and he will feel that he has achieved something big in his life.
Genuine and soft words can do the wonders to your married life. The way a message or a complement is conveyed makes all the differences. This is the reason why it is recommended to praise your spouse in such a way that he or she feels desired and cared for.
Every woman loves to listen to how beautiful she is. You must complement your wife when she is looking beautiful. Praise her in the new gown she has just bought and you will be showered with her love, affection and care. You must maintain your individuality and respect other’s feelings.
If your wife has joined a gym and constantly working hard to lose some pounds from her body; you can understand that she is doing this to impress you. You must praise her for her efforts and compliment her how she looks after the workout and how much she has lost successfully. She is going to feel good about it. These are some small but important factors which can keep your married life happier and successful.
Have you ever tried to take your spouse as your best friend? You probably do not understand the friendship and love. We do not divorce our friends but we fall in and out of love very quickly. Friends are going to stay forever and this is not true in case of love and spouses.
We try head over heels to get rid of our spouses and get ready to fight in courtrooms. However, if you understand the fact that your spouse can be your best friend; you will not need to pay for lawyers fees. We fight with our friends and promise ourselves that we are not going to see them ever. However, the next moment, we are back again and hardly remember what has gone wrong. The same can be applicable to our spouses and hence marriage.
Forgiveness is the keyword and it must be remembered by all those people who find it hard to compromise with their life partners. Become a rock in your married life where nothing can stop and affect your wedding and the relationship.
Become friends and enjoy what you want to enjoy with your best friends such as long drives, late night outs and going on mountains with your beloved. Add spark in your life with enduring friendship with your husband or wife. This will not only strengthen your relationship but you both will be appreciated by people around you. You will also become the role models for your kids when they are in their adulthood.
For all those people, who can measure their happiness with the amount of money they have received as a result of divorce, we will like to mention that emotional and psychological losses are much more than the financial loss and there is no way you can heal these wounds. Your kids will suffer and you will not be able to provide them the support you have promised to give them when they were born. You will not do justice to their childhood and the rest of their lives.
Will they be able to forgive you for snatching one parent from them? Maybe never!!!
Marriage is a big responsibility as large as a life is. It becomes your duty to take care of your responsibilities in the right manner. Running away from problems is one of the ultimate solutions; give yourself some time and see what you will lose.